These fading days

by Oak Hill Studio

The days are quickly fading, and I don’t mean only the changing of the seasons with nightfall getting earlier and earlier. More and more often it seems of late, there is a little voice that echoes in my mind, reminding me that the years, they are quickly passing.  How fleeting this life is.

It came to me again, just this afternoon as I was making my bed and noticed how the once brightly colored coverlet now has a muted appearance, its once starchy fabric, now yielding and compliant.  Why does it look so, it isn’t that old….well, yes, it probably has already been 7 or 8 years since I carefully chose it from the LL Bean catalog.  

And, of course, there are other reminders, almost daily.  Looking at pictures of myself and others I had known only 10 short years ago tell the story.  My they are looking older now–just like me.  And their children, they are also teenagers like my own two.  When I last saw her she looked so different and I have somehow left her back in yesteryear, when she’s been a fellow traveler all along!

One of the biggest reminders that confronts me daily, is that Luke is now in college.  It is hard to think of this in concrete, “there’s no going back,” terms.  In fact, I prefer not to think like that at all.  I refuse to think of the likelihood of him never living (full time) at home ever again.  It is too painful…so much bittersweet; too hard to digest.

I have always cherished thoughts of him when he was like this:

Luke, age 3

Yet, sometimes it is bitter, wishing for the sweet taste of yesterday, only to be denied.  Those days are gone.  Period.

But, God in His rich grace mixes sweet with the bitter.  As I choose to focus on today, and the positives, I am cheered.

Last weekend we got to visit him on campus, and what a pleasure those few hours were!

Luke, age 17

I am seeing many positive character traits in my son, and I find myself growing in admiration of him.  I love to be with him and hear his thoughts and opinions.  In all honesty, it was difficult at times in the early to mid teen years, and I have no doubt that much was due to my own approach with him.  Again, God’s rich grace.

He is growing into a fine young man and is, in many ways, wise beyond his years.  He has challenged me to think deeply about issues, and I have emerged a different person, hopefully better and wiser for the challenges he has set before me.  He sets high standards for himself which keep him ever reaching upward in many ways.  He is creative, fun, witty, and quite smart, and yeah, I just truly love and enjoy my son!  (For those still going through trials and challenges with their children, I urge you to NEVER give up on them!  Love them as best and fully as you can, each and every day!  It is key.)

And so, fading days aside, I am choosing to cherish all of it, for the passing night must always yield to the glorious day!